about me · anxiety · favorites · fun · fun in the sun · gardening · job anxiety · life changes · memories · Thoughts and feelings

Home Away From Home

There is so much I want to say. The last month or so has been crazy. My lovely internship at an urban farm has taken up the bulk of my time 3 days out of my week. Much of it has been good but I’ve had hard days. I have had a lot of fun…… Continue reading Home Away From Home

about me · anxiety · Hopes and fears · personal growth · social anxiety

I Don’t Even Know Anymore

I must have been gone too long from this blog because I saw I got a lot of recent follows from what seems like spam blogs. Ugh. I’ve been here and there but still moving along in life. Or trying to, at least. Most days, I feel as if I just have too many thoughts…… Continue reading I Don’t Even Know Anymore

about me · anxiety · chinese customs · COVID-19 · family · orchids · school · social anxiety

Tired of This S***

Second month into 2021 and I’m trudging along. How’s your year been so far? I’ve been okay for the most part. The improvements and the struggles continue. My current therapist reminded me in my latest session with him to treat myself gently like I would treat a friend. And it’s true, I often forget to…… Continue reading Tired of This S***

about me · anxiety · school life · social anxiety

Conundrum of Life

Hi again. I am still here. I’ve opened WordPress a few times since my last post with ideas of what to write. I decided against it. I remember some of my old, old posts from when I first started WordPress and it’s embarrassing how hard I tried, through my depression and anxiety, to be positive.…… Continue reading Conundrum of Life

about me · anxiety · mental health · school anxiety · social anxiety

A Single Moment

Trigger warning: Mentions of suicide and suicidal thoughts (towards the end of the blog post). You know the feeling when life gives you problem after problem and it starts to pile up because they’re issues you can’t solve right away but you’re trying to hold it all together and not lose your s**t? And then…… Continue reading A Single Moment

anxiety · avoidance tendencies · social anxiety

The Mess Inside Me

I feel defeated. So many times during the hours, the weeks, the months, and the years of my life, the thought comes up that this life isn’t worth living. I know I am treading on thin ice with such a declaration. I’ve never been the optimistic sort of person. Every turn of my life scares…… Continue reading The Mess Inside Me

anxiety · social anxiety · socially awkward

Thoughts and More Thoughts

My brain goes through a nonstop cycle of thinking. I had a somewhat morbid thought last night after I switched off my lamp and settled into a comfortable stillness under my blankets: that it’s impossible for my mind to stop being active even during sleep, unless I died and my brain shut down permanently. It’s…… Continue reading Thoughts and More Thoughts