Growing up, I watched Dateline and those true crime exposé shows like Snapped and Deadly Women. I was drawn in by the dramatic style of how those real-life stories were presented, though the reenactments were my least favorite. It was fascinating to sometimes see real interviews from people who knew the murderers on a personal level. Some…… Continue reading Wouldn’t Hurt a Fly
There are framed pictures of me all over the house. I did not put them there, and if I lived alone, adorning the walls with my image would not be on my to-do list. I don’t exactly hate my own face as much as I used to, so it’s not that I am disgusted by…… Continue reading Pictures of Me
I run the pad of my finger over the soft surface in pursuit of flat smoothness, of bumps, and unevenness. A formed habit from long ago, isn’t it strange how much I think I need this? I come back to the same spot again and again; stuck over the sensation of a jagged healing crust.…… Continue reading The Everlasting Search
I am a control freak. Anytime I’m in a situation or in a mood where I feel there are things that are out of my control or influence, I act out. The most common way I “act out” is being more impatient in the way I speak because I am so frustrated by the loss…… Continue reading Loss of Control & Tone of Voice
I never enjoy passing on messages for other people. Firstly, the immediate response I always have is a casual, “Sure, okay”, even though I’m screaming on the inside, “NOO, I don’t want to do it! NO!” The affirmative words always come out like an instant cue where I am compelled to give a reply right…… Continue reading Passing On Messages / Being Asked for Help
I keep making the same mistake again. I’ll be honest about what it is, but even on this blog, I am feeling kind of embarrassed to write openly about the issue. It’s been a recurring problem that I want to change. Not to change for other people, but for myself because the choice I keep…… Continue reading I’m Late = Avoid the Situation
I felt so bizarre being around people. Public transit is not something I use every day but I did today after several days of not hopping on a subway. Around junior high school, a nervous reflex I developed was to blink a lot. It got so prevalent that, when one of my teachers mentioned having…… Continue reading On the Subway
It’s only the second day in a row of a mixture of cloudy and rainy weather, but I am going a little insane from staying indoors today. Commonly, in the hours before I go out, I get caught up thinking about the small things, like if I can actually bring myself to make my wish…… Continue reading Going Out & New Environments
I took advantage of the 70 degree weather today by letting my just washed hair dry under the sun. Standing on the top step landing in the backyard, I caught my reflection against the window. If not for that, I would not have seen that strands of my hair were already sticking up as they…… Continue reading Hair Ramblings
I am exhausted today for no particular reason. Maybe it has something to do with me staying up wide awake past the wee hours of midnight after failing to be lulled into dreamland in order to finish reading Crimson Bound by Rosamund Hodge. I had so many “What the hell, did that just happen?” moments while…… Continue reading Body Aches & Family Drama
Don't mind me, I'm justanervousgirl. 