college days · daily · gardening · nature · plants · ramblings

A Brief Respite from Stress, Sorta

I think I had too much coffee yesterday afternoon so the caffeine is still circulating in my system. Voila, I am insomniac and wide awake! I’ve reached that point in the college semester where everything feels like I am trying to hold it all together but I am also so burnt out from the endless…… Continue reading A Brief Respite from Stress, Sorta

anxiety · fitness · life · school life · Thoughts and feelings

Another Day Gone

Nighttime has come; the end of another day gone. I’m tired; it seems my body habitually goes into low battery mode after a stressful event. Hours ago I met with a professor on Zoom to discuss a possible research project idea that I am interested in pursuing under his mentorship. I have never been this…… Continue reading Another Day Gone

about me · anxiety · fitness · life · mental health · Physical health · school life · Thoughts and feelings

Sinking or Swimming

My posts continue to be melancholic. I feel like I have been in a haze. Self-preservation is an innate instinct and that’s what I’ve been trying to do. Just surviving somehow. My physical and mental health took some hits during the stay-at-home order. I think I still am suffering, maybe from the aftereffects, even though…… Continue reading Sinking or Swimming

life · Physical health · ramblings · school life · Thoughts and feelings

Checking In After An Absence

Wow I haven’t checked WordPress in weeks, except to give a random like to a passing post I enjoyed reading for 5 minutes or reply to a comment someone left me on my blog. I don’t really have a negative or positive opinion for my absence. Life goes on everywhere. There was a time in…… Continue reading Checking In After An Absence

anxiety · life · ramblings · school life

Get Through This

I’ve not gone out in the last 3-4 days. That’s an estimate since I lost count as the days are slowly blending into one another. The only real schedule I am on is the days and times I have my online classes from Mondays to Thursdays. Most of my courses still meet virtually (on Blackboard…… Continue reading Get Through This

about me · anxiety · school life · social anxiety

Conundrum of Life

Hi again. I am still here. I’ve opened WordPress a few times since my last post with ideas of what to write. I decided against it. I remember some of my old, old posts from when I first started WordPress and it’s embarrassing how hard I tried, through my depression and anxiety, to be positive.…… Continue reading Conundrum of Life

about me · anxiety · mental health · school anxiety · social anxiety

A Single Moment

Trigger warning: Mentions of suicide and suicidal thoughts (towards the end of the blog post). You know the feeling when life gives you problem after problem and it starts to pile up because they’re issues you can’t solve right away but you’re trying to hold it all together and not lose your s**t? And then…… Continue reading A Single Moment

about me · anxiety · school · school life · social anxiety

Stiff as a Board

Hey all. It’s been a challenging few weeks. I don’t know if I will ever fully adjust to this thing called life. I am almost at my last week in the hotel hospitality course. Today was a doozy. The course curriculum from the beginning till now has been building up and preparing me for my…… Continue reading Stiff as a Board

anxiety · Comfort zone · daily · life · people · school life · social anxiety · Thoughts and feelings

Highs & Lows

Last evening I trekked home during heavy rainfall in my area. It was such a monster storm that my socks and shoes got the brute of it I could hear squelching with every step I took. The lower portion of my pants were also oversaturated with water and the rain came down so hard it…… Continue reading Highs & Lows

anxiety · Comfort zone · daily · Hopes and fears · life · ramblings · school life · social anxiety

Excitement or Anxiety

It feels like too much adrenaline is still pumping in my veins from what I went through today. Even when good things happen to me, how my body responds to that stress is dizzying. I can’t tell the difference between the rush of excitement and anxiety. They feel close in similarity. Might be that I…… Continue reading Excitement or Anxiety