challenges · courage · life · personal beliefs · personal growth

Household Nuisance

The worst thing about still living with family is how easy it is to be broken down by their criticism. I can’t help but think if I lived elsewhere, it would’ve been more like an Okay, that’s your opinion and I don’t really care. Somehow it feels more personal and affects me more deeply than…… Continue reading Household Nuisance

anxiety · college days · daily · life · overthinking things · Thoughts and feelings

Life Stressors

I’m contemplating visiting my professor during his office hours on Tuesday to talk to him about my discomfort with being back in a classroom around people after attending virtual-only courses for several semesters. I don’t know how exactly voicing my concerns to him will change anything. I’m unhappy the classroom itself is small and it…… Continue reading Life Stressors

anxiety · gardening · school · social anxiety

High-Low-High-Low

Why does this keep happening to me?? The more social interactions I have, the more I have for reflecting upon at the end of my day. Those reflections don’t usually occur until I’ve had time to settle in at home after dinner with a shower and a change of clothes. Then I have adequate space…… Continue reading High-Low-High-Low

Coping with anxiety · life changes · school life

Too Much At Once?

When I transferred to a four-year college in 2020, I had already completed two years’ worth of schooling under the general Liberal Arts degree. The school I transferred into had an Urban Sustainability program that I went for, and as a result, most of my completed credits were transferred in but I had additional classes…… Continue reading Too Much At Once?

about me · anxiety · Hopes and fears · mental health · perception · reflections · social anxiety · socially awkward

A Week’s Worth

I’m stuck in a conundrum of not knowing if I’m doing too much in life right now or if I am not doing enough. I don’t know why I am making this a question. Everything and anything I am doing now should be more than enough. Aren’t I fine precisely as I am? Minutes earlier,…… Continue reading A Week’s Worth

Feeling ill · life changes · Physical health · ramblings · Thoughts and feelings

5 Days of Rest

On Thursday, I woke up with the worst sore throat ever. The feeling was like someone had stabbed my throat with a needle. It startled me so much I thought, This can’t be real, am I still dreaming? I was not. I quickly downed two cups of water, which was not enough to lessen the…… Continue reading 5 Days of Rest

anxiety · life · ramblings · relationships · social anxiety · Thoughts and feelings

Jumping Through a Day

I hacked off several inches of my hair two days earlier. I have not gone to the salon in years and to this day I refuse to. I hate being waited on like that and I certainly don’t like having a stranger touch me even if it’s strictly professional and not sexual in any way.…… Continue reading Jumping Through a Day

anxiety · life · ramblings · social anxiety · Thoughts and feelings

Battle of the Mind

I’ve had a lot of days lately. Good days. Bad days. Okay days. And a few sleepless nights. I used to be quite resistant to taking naps during the daytime, but now I nap when I feel like I need a quick recharge. I had a difficult workday two Saturdays ago when it was BLAZING…… Continue reading Battle of the Mind

feelings · Hopes and fears · life · life changes · ramblings

Reflecting on Self-Doubt

Coming home after a long workday, the adrenaline rush still hasn’t quite settled yet. I’m too awake and I keep replaying in my mind the day’s events and my actions from throughout the day. Very recently I tried out for a different job role at the same company I currently work for. It was a…… Continue reading Reflecting on Self-Doubt

Comfort zone · Conflicting emotions · life · Thoughts and feelings

What To Feel

I made it through the hard-biting winter and am enjoying the warmness of almost summer. I opted not to enroll in any college courses during the Spring 2022 semester because I had too much going on with work and other things. I didn’t want to take on more than I could handle at the time.…… Continue reading What To Feel