bad habits · Comfort zone · Coping with anxiety · coworkers · daily habits · eye contact · feelings · flaws · flight or fight · insecurities · jobs · mental health · personal growth · personal habits · ramblings · relationships · school life · social anxiety · social norms · socially awkward · Thoughts and feelings

How to Slow Down

I’ve got another work story to tell. It’s one I feel less negative about than everything I wrote about yesterday, however, it’s still something that I’m only figuring out now has been a life-long habit I’ve developed. On Saturdays I am mainly around one other coworker, Adele. She also works at the same site as…… Continue reading How to Slow Down

about me · anxiety · flaws · life · Perspective on life · wants

Never Good Enough

Many years ago, when the daily struggle of functioning on a basic level was harder then than it is now, I remember looking at myself in the mirror. I didn’t like what I saw. I was still picking at my facial scabs quite often at the time. My reconstruction of this memory may be a…… Continue reading Never Good Enough

about me · anxiety · Comfort zone · Conflicting emotions · family · feelings · flaws · insecurities · Making mistakes · parents · people problems · personal growth · personal habits · regrets · siblings · social anxiety · socially awkward · verbal communication

After the Storm

Who knew I would be here in 2019. Just a few days ago I was bubbling with excitement and trepidation over the vocational school I signed up for in the hopes of landing a job after graduation. I thought, This is it, I am finally doing something with my life. I’ve made a decision for…… Continue reading After the Storm

about me · anxiety · challenges · family · flaws · Hopes and fears · life · parents · Thoughts and feelings · wishes

Messed Up on the Inside

For a long time now I have been alienating myself from those who care about me. Right now I feel so conflicted because I haven’t been totally honest with them. It’s true it is uncomfortable to have those sit-down talks with them because I didn’t grow up comfortable telling them everything and it got harder…… Continue reading Messed Up on the Inside

about me · anxiety · challenges · Comfort zone · flaws · life · overthinking things · people · people problems · perception · personal beliefs · race and identity · ramblings · Thoughts and feelings · verbal communication

Mixed Feelings about Race, Language, and People

Sigh. This post is like a huge garage dump for all my conflicted thoughts on several interrelated matters. I revised the title like 3 times already because I kept delving into other topics from the one topic I wanted to write about. Sometimes it feels like the gap in the generational and cultural differences between…… Continue reading Mixed Feelings about Race, Language, and People

anxiety · emotions · fears · feelings · flaws · writing

Intensity of Emotion

The gush of emotion is unadulterated and cuts me at the quick. It comes; unexpected and at full force. Every time. I’ve had years to learn ways to control how I react when the emotion is too intense, too much for me to handle. My methods have succeeded sometimes and failed in others. I’ve become…… Continue reading Intensity of Emotion