anxiety · Thoughts and feelings

Floating By

I am a weird place in life. Are you? As usual, I can’t outrun the chaos inside my own mind. Sometimes a little bit of that is good, or bad depending on the kind it is. Not sure which I have today. I am there and I am not, in the sense I don’t feel like I am fully living in the moment and only just dealing with the seconds and hours till the day is over and the whole debacle starts anew tomorrow. I am not unhappy but not happy either. It’s not like being entirely numb to emotion and feelings, more like they’re muted to some extent. The more I feel the more tired I am, even though I’ve been kinda quiet today and then the spare moments where I pushed myself to be responsive and engaging seemed to drain me. I didn’t sleep well last night, maybe that is it. And of course I have a lot on my mind (what’s new…).

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